Resolutions

January 11, 2013

By Bridget Grella

I find that January is the month that I have always focused on the good from the prior year and what I didn’t do so that I can move it forward to the New Year.

I also give myself a break. If I couldn’t achieve it in the prior year I ask myself: Did I set unrealistic goals? Where could I set this objective to be reasonable and fair to myself? Almost like giving yourself an easy one to get the momentum going.

Last year happened to be the year I became officially divorced. The emotional strain it puts on your life is only second to death and really can potentially define you if you let it.
I underestimated just how the divorce would affect me. I still find myself avoiding the question and still do not offer the information unless I am forced. For me, I took the vow for better or for worse. It did define me, I was a wife. I was part of a couple. I had someone to grow old with…Changing that view of yourself is very difficult, especially if you still loved the person you were legally removing yourself from.

So the long and the short of it is that life does move on, all of your friends and family that said that time heals was right…I could not imaging that to be the case but here I am. Armed with time…I am healing and in a better position to actually set resolutions in 2013 that will be achieved.

Personally fitness has been at the top of my list. Feeling strong and limitless is essential. I began the journey in October of 2011 and today as I write I am leaner, stronger and a cleaner eater. I am also feeling sugar withdrawal from the holidays…but boy was it fun. I also want to establish this as the norm for my daughters. What comes from a fine tuned body is a better sense of self which for young woman can make or break a teenage life. This journey is not only for me but for my daughters. Momma bear (which is what they call me) will always pave the way for her cubs.

Financial fitness. Legal bills, single parenthood, and self-employment all scare the crap out of me. It is more of the unknown…but now that I know what single life and Momma bear looks like, I will have a better handle on 2013. I have always had the independence thing going on…just ask my father…if he said it was a musket I would argue it was a bayonet and so on and so on. Did not want to be told what to do and always looked for an opportunity to have a debate or to prove myself right…My father would suggest that I study Russian and I would take up Mandarin…what I did to that poor man. I have a daughter that behaves the same way. My Father just smiles…

Be kind to yourself when setting your resolutions for 2013. Start with the good and then give yourself a low flying resolution to feel great about achieving. If Personal fitness is your goal then start small. Ease into it…this is a change to keep for life not just for a few months. Ironically the same holds true for finance. Start small…this is a change to keep for life. Identify what triggers you to fail. Sugar is my trigger on the fitness side and any consumer discretionary item is my trigger for the financial. I smile as I write this but it is true…Sugar and Nordstrom are a deadly mix. I am writing this on January 6th three days before my six month consumer discretionary fast. Full disclosure: I have purchased a few items to get the cubs and I through the fast. Just paving the way…

Be good—Momma Bear